How to Dominate a Woman

BDSM is different for men and women because they experience it in different ways. The way you dominate a man is not the way you dominate a woman and if you don’t keep this in mind then the relationship may break down because she’s not getting what she needs. There are two differences between dominating men and women and those are the physical differences and the mental differences.

The physical difference is the body parts you can use during play. Breasts, especially the nipples, are sensitive and her pussy can be a good way to arouse her during punishment. The mental difference is that women are more into the verbal side of things and it turns them on more than it does for men. Men tend to be more visual and seeing something right on front of them will turn them on more than having something said to them. If you use an approach that affects her mentally and physically then it’s easy to have her enjoy BDSM and look forward to submission.

Mental Domination

Words can have a powerful effect on women and can influence the way they think and feel. When you want to dominate a woman make sure you speak in a clear, even tone. Sound serious and let her know you won’t tolerate any nonsense. Keep eye contact while speaking to her. This will assert your authority over her and she will feel a need to obey.

The breasts and pussy are the main symbols of womanhood and a lot of women are defined by them. They see it as an important part of themselves and it can be a good area to focus on if you’re into verbal domination. Tell her that sex is all she’s good for or that men only like her because she had big breasts. It may seem silly but it reduces her to a sex object instead of a person. That takes away part of her ability to see herself as an individual and more as something for you to use.

Name calling or the giving of a name can have the same effect. Calling her things like “Slut” or “Girl” takes away her individuality and her sense of worth. You’re controlling the way she feels and that makes her feel helpless. Women who are into submission enjoy feeling helpless for different reasons. Some like to be degraded while others like to feel they have someone stronger around who will look after them and some have their own personal reasons.

Mental domination isn’t just verbal, it can also be you giving her a routine to follow or using body language. Tell her that she needs to do a certain thing; whatever it is can be determined by the couple. Maybe she has to meet you when you come home from work naked and with a cold drink. Get her into the routine and she’ll get used to serving you. This teaches her obedience, but also gives her a sense of purpose, of pleasing her Dominant. Using body language such as leaning over her can reinforce your strength and her weakness. Snapping your fingers at her when she’s moving too slow shows your frustration, without you even needing to say a word. It’s a quick, sharp sound and one that will get her attention. Little cues can help her become attune to what you’re feeling towards her and that changes the way she thinks about herself.

Physical Domination

The most sensitive areas on a woman are her breasts and pussy. These are the key areas when dominating a woman and heighten what she’s feeling. During BDSM play, focus on these areas to increase the pain and pleasure she feels.

Breast Bondage

breast bondage


Use a length of rope and tie it around one breast, making it tight and then loop the rope around her back and tie up her other breast. It will cut off her blood flow and will increase the sensation in her breasts where the blood is now trapped. You can just leave her like this or take it further if she’s into pain. Slap her breasts with an open palm or run your fingernails over her nipples. Don’t leave her like this for too long since loss of blood flow can lead to damage.

Pussy Spanking

pussy spanking

This is a great way to make her hurt but lets you control just how much pain you give her. It’s good to do it when she’s aroused because that’s when her pussy has the most blood flow and sensitivity. Have her part her legs and give her pussy an open handed smack. Start lightly and see if she’s okay with it. If she is – then keep going, gradually smacking her harder until she tells you to stop.

Physical domination doesn’t have to be big acts; it can be small things that give the little reminders of their submission. Nipple Clamps are a great toy that can be used on her breasts and pussy to inflict a small touch of pain. You can get ones that are two separate clamps or get ones that are joined by a chain. Have her wear the nipple clamps during play or for a certain period of time outside of play to keep your dominance over her. Have her wear them while you’re out with friends or watching TV. If they’re the ones joined by a chain then give them a tug now and again, the clamps will pinch her nipples and give her a burst of pain. A good way to bring mental and physical domination together is by using them at the same time.

Call her a worthless slut while spanking her or before starting a play session make her undress for you and give herself over to you while telling her that from now until the end of play she belongs to you.

Word of Advice From Professional

When it comes to BDSM and women it’s better to take things slow and ease her into it. Start off with small things, so trust can be build between her and her play partner. See what she likes and doesn’t like and then build your future Domination play on that.  Let the play begin…



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